A Five Year Prayer Answered

Early in my adulthood life, it came so natural for me to tell people the truths in the Bible that I would read.  I found such enjoyment with sharing those truths.  What I began to find was that people didn't want to hear them.  They would begin to avoid me. They would stop being my friend. They would share lies with others about me instead of just receiving God's truth in their own life.  It caused such pain for me.  I lost friends because of it.  I was truly trying to live my life for God and share Him with others, yet they would not receive it and would hurt me because of it.  Eventually, I quit telling people God's truths. I just kept them to myself.  As I continued to seek God and learn about Him, I came across Ephesians 4:15 "speak the truth in love." I stopped and starred off realizing that I was  missing a key ingredient when I had spoke God's truths to people - LOVE.  Well, the people I would speak His truths to, I loved. That 's why I would tell them, because I cared about them.  But, the scripture didn't say to share His truths with people that I loved. It said to share His truth's IN love.  How in the world do I do that? What does that even look like?

I had pondered about this for years. But, I still never felt like I had gotten a good grasp and understanding of HOW to do that.  So, I continued to just keep God's truth's to myself. Then I joined a God seeking radical group of people who were going to start a church.  The pastors always had stories of them sharing God's truths to people that they knew, and it making an eternal impact in these peoples lives.  I began praying for God to use me to do that also.  I learned from these pastors that you must have a relationship with the person you share with. That I will not and am not the person to change them, but it is the Holy Spirit's job to do that, but that I am just the messenger of His love.  That it will not be successful if I am judgmental or condemning when sharing. I learned so much and continued to pray for God to use me in such a way - either to share Christ with unbelievers or for me to make disciples.

I have a dear friend that I've known for years.  We have a special friendship that is nothing less than God ordained.  We truly love each other and know the ins and outs of our lives, marriages, strengths, weaknesses, etc.  One day the Lord revealed a truth about her to me.  It threw me back, because it was really unpleasant.  For days I could not get this out of my mind.  I sought God about it, and I felt the Holy Spirit tell me to share this ugly truth with her.  I was terrified. It made my heart race. I questioned the Holy Spirit, and He said that it was also for me to receive some healing and find some strength in sharing His truth in love.

I prayed about how to tell her, what to say, when to do it, etc. He guided me to write her an email.  I did it with much anxiety, but I was obedient to His leading.  She received God's truth, sent me a nice message back, and gave me a big hug the next time I saw her.  It did bring me much healing, but it also brought an answer to a five year prayer. A prayer for me to be able to share God's truths to people again but this time in LOVE.  Just days after doing that, I've had a few other opportunities to share God's truths in love.  It seems God has released me to share again, because I finally learned how to incorporate the key ingredient.

How humbled I am to be the daughter of a forgiving and patient God.  How grateful I am to be part of such a God seeking, radical church and wise pastors that have befriended me and have been so patient with me also.

I only want to live my life for Him and allow Him to use me to help others to do the same.